Space Moose feature cartoon annotations

Space Moose annotations

The following is a listing of cartoons and comments which have been featured on the Space Moose home page. The dates in parentheses indicate the time at which the comments, not the strips, were written.

Stop animal violence

Oftentimes, when a strip is done, I will take a few minutes to go over it again and fill in empty space with goofy stuff. The title on a book, a slogan on a t-shirt, or a flaccid penis mounted on a wall in the background can subtly add so much. I was really unsatisfied with this strip before I started putting in all the extra detail. [July 17, 1996]

Waiting for Space Moose

Space Moose delays what seems like an important meeting in this 12th instalment of the animal kingdom kumite. In frame 5, the tuatara can be seen calmly contemplating Space Moose's absence. Or, possibly, he is considering his chances in the upcoming rounds of the tournament. In any case, he looks pretty smug. And why shouldn't he? He's the closest living relative to the dinosaurs, for Christ's sake! [July 29, 1996]

Renting a video

Monty Python fans will recognize the punchline to this strip. I wanted it to end with Space Moose hitting on Chad, but I could not think of anything as concise and direct as this famous line. I struggled with it for quite some time, but I could not think of a better alternative. While I was discussing my predicament with a friend, he immediately suggested, "so, when do you get off work?" This was exactly what I was looking for, but it was too late; the strip had already been submitted. [January 28, 1997]

Clip n' save

I had hoped this strip would clear up some confusion regarding Billy Badger. A lot of people refer to him as Billy the bionic Beaver, and, in the last reader poll, several people voted for "that mole guy". Listen, Billy is an American badger, Taxidea taxus, a burrowing carnivorous hunter. He is not a rodent, let alone a beaver, nor is he a mole. Moles are tiny little insectivores, and beavers are big fat vegetarians. Billy's tremendous body weight can be attributed to his powerful hydraulics, titanium chassis, and voracious appetite (for Fritos).

For more information on badgers, visit The Virtual Badger Sett, Badgers Page, or if you are truly a loser, alt.animals.badgers on the usenet. [October 16, 1997]

More animals... where?

This was an unispired strip. I had to move the animal kingdom kumite plot along, but was not able to do so in a very entertaining way. The punchline here was just a lead-in to the next strip, Space Moose's ark, which was much better. [August 2, 1996]

Rumpleshithead

A classic fairy tale is retold in Space Moose style. Up until last week, this strip went unpublished (as a blunt consequence of the A&B Sound/Slur affair). But, Slur has since stood its ground and taken Space Moose back. Managing editor Dave Johnston even said, "[Space Moose] is a welcome shot at the conservative sensibilities of our society, and I wish we had more content along these lines."

University of Alberta student, Drew Barreth, pointed out an interesting quality of this strip. If the margins of your web browser are set just right (and your computer is fast enough) you can flip back and forth between the left and right halves such that frames 5 & 6 and 6 & 7 overlap. If done fast enough, Space Moose and the "retarded elf" will become crudely animated and appear to move. It's lame, but fun nonetheless.

After reading this strip, Space Moose guest author and bon vivant Don Husereau suggested that it should have been called "Rumpleforeskin," and I could not agree more. [April 10, 1996]

Space Moose and Friends

In its second season, NBC's Friends had become enormously popular amongst the Gen X cafe latte crowd. It got to the point where you could not swing a dead dik-dik without hitting a group of dorks doing Chandler impressions, singing "Smelly Cat," or speculating on the status of Ross and Rachel. Something had to be done.

I never watched a full episode of Friends before endeavoring to write this strip. For the sake of research, I forced myself through a few shows, and I shamefully admit now that I enjoyed them. Maybe it was Schwimmer's guileless charm. Maybe it was Kudrow's hot ass. Maybe it was the monkey. I do not know why, but I kept coming back for more.

This last season totally sucked, and I was able to break the habit. However, I do find the unmoustached Tom Selleck wildly erotic. [July 30, 1997]

Space Moose's ark

Reverend S. Moose paints a dire picture for humanity before boarding his sturdy vessel, the HMS Dildo. It was very difficult to script Space's farewell speech. I spent a long time trying to come up with something that would insult and horrify the Christ-coddling cretins who came to see him off. The final text was okay, but I hoped for something more hard-hitting. [August 19, 1996]

Have you ever read this shit?

The animal kingdom kumite plot finally ended with this apocalyptic episode. Space Moose, probably addled from the bible reading, carelessly dozes off and drops his Cuban cigar setting the ark ablaze. Just for the record, I am not one of these new young cigar-smoking hipsters, although I have to admit, it would be pretty cool if I was. [August 26, 1996]

The lesions aren't herpetic

Scripted by Don Husereau, this brilliant strip has to be one of the most memorable. I have had a few people recount to me routine medical check-ups that they have had after seeing this strip. One fellow, who will remain nameless only because I cannot remember his name, said that he started cracking up as soon as the doctor donned the rubber glove, and he could not stop chuckling during the rectal digital exam. As a result, his prostate cancer went undetected, and he died one month later at work. He was a pilot. He took 213 passengers with him to his watery grave. Only some of this paragraph is true. [December 21, 1998]

Space Moose versus Toilet Man

The original idea for this strip was pretty modest, but after a brainstorming session with some friends, it became a much more ambitious project. Ultimately, I decided to go with a triple-length format and still had trouble cramming everything into it. The final product was Space Moose`s greatest tour de filth. Unprecedented was the disturbing shot of Space's flaccid genitalia in frame 2. It is a good idea to deal with things like this early on. [February 24, 1997]

Educated black man

I have been called a racist for creating this strip. Why? (I guess) Because it depicts a visible minority in a quasi-negative role. That is all it takes to upset some people. These are the nimrods who think that every joke about women is sexist, and every joke about homosexuality is homophobic. There is a loophole if you happen to be female or gay, respectively, but let's not get into that right now.

Racism is prejudice stemming from the belief that race directly determines human traits and capacities such that a particular race is superior to another. That is a belief I do not possess, and I cannot see, using the broadest stretch of imagination, how this week's feature cartoon implies it. The Malcolm X wannabe instantly turns on Space Moose for no good reason. The two are incapable of interacting rationally because of "Malcolm's" belligerence. It is his single-minded prejudice which is being satirized in this strip. Space Moose, of course, takes perverse pleasure in being verbally abused. [March 10, 1998]

Hey, Mr. Businessman

I used to carry a little pocketbook with me at all times. In it, I would write down strip ideas or gag lines whenever they occurred to me. It was useful for a while, but I started forgetting and eventually stopped carrying it around. The idea for this strip was several years old and long forgotten when I rediscovered it while flipping through the old pocketbook. The disgruntled folk singer is based on Ani Defranco whom I admittedly know little about. Friend Jason Medwid helped admirably with the lyrics. [November 14, 1996]

Rocky & Bullwinkle

Inspiration for this strip was provided by Kris Tabin who sent me e-mail suggesting I do something with Space Moose and Billy's obvious resemblance to Rocky and Bullwinkle (not respectively). In the last year, I have been e-mailed many strip ideas from many different fans, and although few of them get used I do appreciate having fresh concepts to work with. So, keep 'em coming. [October 1, 1996]

Karate Man

I used to argue a lot about the effectiveness of martial arts. Sure, they get glorified in the movies, but those fights are choreographed to look cool, not real. Nobody in his right mind would run head first into Bruce Lee's flailing leg. After watching the Ultimate Fighting Championships, it seems to me that the only martial arts that work are the ones concerned with grappling and submission holds. But still, there are a lot of people who seem to think that standing in their bathrobes while throwing a series of robotic punches and shouting "Hai!" will give them an edge in a real fight. Marlo is clearly the type of person who would buy into this nonsense, and Space Moose is only too happy to knock him down a few notches. [May 8, 1997]

This is Miranda

There are two subtly different versions of this strip: the one here on the web, and the one on page 80 of Triumph of the whim. In the latter, frames 3 and 4 got switched, a blunder that was overlooked by myself and my proofreader/crank dealer. Fortunately, this error only weakens the strip slightly. I wish I could say same about the error made on page 79 where frames 5 and 6 of Rocky & Bullwinkle got swapped.

This strip features another free product placement for SCORE magazine(tm), not to be confused with Score golf magazine. I am not certain if Ron Jeremy ever appeared in SCORE, but chances are pretty good. Still, I should have done my homework. [April 19, 1998]

Why are we going to the airport?

Complete story credits for this strip go to superfan Iain Getty of the Univeristy of Alberta's pompously renamed geography department. Mr. Getty's uncanny grasp of the mechanism which motivates Space Moose and the complex relationships between the regular characters is surpassed only by his enduring sycophancy. Iain continues to send me strip ideas whenever his brain farts one up, most of which involve his bizarre fixation on comas. If you ever read a Space Moose strip containing comatose characters, you can be pretty certain that Iain Getty was behind it. [October 1, 1997]

Antlers of the damned

It seems rather pointless to annotate this strip given how much has been written about it already (see ANTLERS), but I want to give a little personal background. When I was about 20, a few Chick tracts had been purloined from the desk of Campus Crusade for Christ, and were circulating through the student clubs. They eventually fell into my hands (I was president of the sexiest club on campus at the time) and caused such uproarious laughter and abdominal spasms that I nearly shat myself. I wanted to keep them, but they had to be returned before any of the Christ Crusaders found out they were missing. Years later, I was browsing in a video store when I discovered the Chick tract "Bad Bob" placed subtly, but deliberately, in the horror movie section. I was overjoyed to see it, and relived that wonderful day when I first read Chick. (This time, I did soil myself, my bowels being somewhat older and weaker.)

Soon after, I became a huge Chick fan. I sent away for the Chick Publications catalog and a free sample of their newsletter, Battle Cry. I had trouble believing that Christians as insane as Chick existed, but there was the evidence right before my eyes. He has an enormous following, both sincere and sarcastic. I would not be the first cartoonist to do a Chick parody, not by a long shot, but I felt it still had to be done. And mine was going to be more vile, twisted and blasphemous than any others.

In the Chick universe, there are basically four types of people: the carefree protagonist who sins and later comes around to Christ, the happy, heaven-bound Christians (or angels) who humbly spread the gospel, the sad, misguided folks who think they are good Christians but invariably end up roasting in the Lake of Fire, and irredeemable assholes who sin, curse Christ and always screw up everything. Of course, Space Moose had to be of the latter. I spent a long time thinking up what evil deed he would commit: sodomy? bestiality? offer candy to children? When it occurred to me to combine all three, the strip more or less wrote itself.

Yes, that is supposed to be Marmaduke in frame 5. As shrewdly noted by Darren Zenko, I should have drawn Snoopy and some other cartoon dogs (Odie? Fred Bassett? Clifford?) waiting in line.

For the full Chick experience, check out http://www.chick.com/. Prepare to be saved, sinner! [April 7, 1998]

Oh, Miranda

Shortly after this strip appeared in the Gateway in October, 1996, I received the following unsigned letter.

Mr Thrasher (if that even is your real name):
I am deeply appalled at your latest "effort", OH, MIRANDA. As a rock star, I am sick and tired of the constant barrage of spandex-bashing and heart-shaped-guitar-mocking that I have to endure each and every day of my life - and that the Gateway sees fit to print each week. Sure, it's taboo to make fun of Christ or organized religion or fags or bitches and sluts, but when it comes to defecating on the wonderous and honorable modern-day Greek Gods - the stars of Classic Rock - your University's substandard rag seems to conveniently turn the other cheek. Where would the youth of today be without the likes of David Lee Roth and Steve Vai? They'd all be DEAD - following in the wobbling heroin-stained footsteps of their precious king, Cobain. Either that or gay. So to you, and all like you, I dedicate a scornful power ballad.

Who do you think wrote this? My guess is that guy from Mr. Big, or possibly one of the Van Halen brothers. [May 11, 1998]

A walk in the park

Space Moose is usually a pretty happy-go-lucky fellow. A special kind of misanthropist, he is quite content with all the ugliness, injustice and misery in the world - it hurts his enemies more than it hurts himself. Few things get under his skin, but nothing so much as human joy. Space Moose's only goal beyond self-gratification is to spread chaos and suffering throughout humanity. In this strip, he sees his hard work being undone. Every child's laughter fuels his ire. [November 12, 1997]

Excretus of Borg

Two unrelated people wrote me regarding the final panel of this strip (the "Moose gone funny" spoof of Marmaduke). One was an ex-resident of Turtleford Saskatchewan whose father is named Ernest. The other was a woman named Shkrobot who wondered how the surname in the strip was chosen. For the record, I picked Turtleford and "Ernest Shkrobot" for the sole reason that they sound funny. Any similarity between the names used and those of actual persons are strictly coincidental, etc..

The strip which appears here is slightly different from the one published in The Gateway. Between submitting a copy to The Gateway and scanning it in for the web page, I altered the text in frame 3 from "I am Excretus of the Borg Collective. Resistance is futile," to "I am Excretus of Borg. You will be ASSimilated," which is a little more in line with the dildo attachment on Space's costume. [January 14, 1997]

A Christmas carol

Space Moose grinches it up in this adaptation of Dickens' classic. Only two people voted for it in the last reader poll, but to hell with polls! I love this strip. The practical lesson here is pure nihilism: those who cling to tradition and compassionate values are weak; total destructiveness will always defeat them. Space Moose's housemates try to teach him a lesson in a very sympathetic, creative manner, but it fails outright to his arrogant brute force. As usual, only Billy Badger is clever enough to foresee the error in their approach (but he lets them try anyway).

The drawing of Marlo tumbling down the stairs with a sillouette of Space Moose above him is one of my best. Asshole uber alles! Inconsistency fans will take note of Space's curious disappearing and reappearing nightcap. [December 29, 1997]